American Idol 4/2/14 Top 8

Tonight, our Top 8 sang duets and the songs from their auditions.

Let's see how they did!


Jessica: Pure beauty. Just one problem though, with the best going on first, that's just going to make the rest of them suck even more. Side note: Jessica's story about being pulled over for eating an ice cream cone makes me want to se her eat an ice cream cone.
#IGotSomethingElseToPutInHerMouth



CJ: When I was 12, my Uncle Bill took myself and his two sons, my cousins Troy and Brian, out hunting in the woods around his house. Troy's dog, Bucky, came along with us. He was this great looking golden retriever. At one point, Bucky ran off into the woods. We called out for him, but Uncle Bill said he probably went back home cause it was close to feeding time. About 20 minutes later, Troy said he spotted a deer. He took aim and fired. There was a terrible yelp. He had shot his own dog. The poor thing lay dying and howling. My cousin did nothing but scream. The mixture of the two was a horrendous noise I hope no one ever has to hear. But, it sounded better than CJ.
#CountryJerkstore



Alex & Jena: They sang P!nk and Fun Guy's "Just Give Me A Reason." Well, they gave me a reason, a reason to turn the channel. This was terrible. It was like mixing rotten eggs and dirt and trying to bake a cake.
#NotCookingByTheBook



Sam: They showed us pics of Sam when he was a young child. They were all taken on an iPhone 3. This kid has about as much range as a tin can tied to a string. Sucks.
#TheWoolfWhoCriedBoy



Jessica & Caleb: They sang "Stop Draggin' My Heart Around." The only thing that was dragging was Caleb. Jessica did her best to carry him during this performance, but you can only do so much with dead weight.
#BeautyAndTheBeast



Malaya: Every time she performs, I keep looking for Jeff Dunham, cause this girl has got to be a puppet. Her voice sounds like somebody trying to impersonate a singer. She's got the personality of a puppet too.
#FraggleCrock



Dexter: This was fine, by country standards.
#JayLenosLostRedneckSon



Malaya & Sam: I'm so glad I do not live on the top floor of a high rise apartment, cause this duet made me want to throw myself out of a window.
#GloomySunday (look it up)



Jena: If Oskar Schindler were alive day and trying to save people from a Holocaust, all of the names of the people who heard this performance would be on his list. This was GAWD awful.
#BurningInTheDeep



Dexter & CJ: Ugh.
#BadBarfAndBeyond



Caleb: Another Cut and Paste performance. And thank you Harry for finally pointing that out.
#IdolIsAChainOfFools



Alex: Sang an "original" song, called "Fairy Tale." Simon Cowell probably had it written for him. Alex is great...at imitating Philip Philips.
#NoHappyEnding